A Christmas Reflection
A wood wick candle flickers on the tray beside me where my lukewarm coffee sits in a Starbucks Virginia cup. Looking at the unlit Christmas tree in morning’s soft light, I feel a nudge in my belly as Owen moves.
He’s beginning to feel cramped and confined within me, stretching his little arms and legs to find more room.
Christmas is only a week away, and we’re preparing, again, for the long trek to our hometown. I don’t mind the ten-hour drive so much when there is no additional traffic, but after the hour and a half delay driving back to Roanoke at Thanksgiving, I’m praying for a smooth drive.
I love this time of year. Sitting by a fire in my parent’s chilly house, driving to find the best light displays in the neighborhood, drinking hot chocolate, and watching It’s a Wonderful Life or White Christmas.
If you’ve ever received a gift from me, I apologize. Choosing a gift for someone has never come easily to me, mostly because I want the gifts I give to be meaningful and something the recipient would genuinely love.
As our trip has inched closer and we’ve bought and wrapped presents to place under trees, a feeling has slowly surfaced in my heart.
I’m not in it for the gifts. I’m not driving for ten hours to see how much was bought for me. I’m not leaving our sweet cats for a week hoping to get the biggest, best gift.
When I’ve thought of the best gift I could get this year, I picture my brothers in their pajamas sitting on the floor by the tree, my dad setting up the camera we’ve begged him not to drag out, my mom in her old, pink terrycloth housecoat, all smiles.
This is how our Christmas mornings have looked for as long as I can remember. Now, I get to add a few more people to the picture with Ryan’s family.
When I picture Christmas, my mind is flooded with images of the gifts God’s already given me in my family that continues to grow, and that fills my heart with joy.
Ryan and I shared our first Christmas as married people last year and this will be our last Christmas as a family of two.
As we journey back to childhood homes and old Christmas trees, I hope to take in every moment as it comes, and not allow the excitement of the future to overshadow the joy of the present.
